I am deciding whether it's the Christmas lights or my monthly dose of feminine hormones that's got me stuck in melancholica.  Whatever it is, it could be fodder for things I (forced myself that I) need to write, which include, but are not limited to:

~three short stories with a kickass theme for NCCA
~two kickass poems for a contest by Meritage
~continuation of our collaborative effort (luckychan and crimson_parsley): "ze novel"

The first two need to be done by December 31.  And did I mention that they have to kick ass?

* * *

Suportahan ang mga bagong manunulat ~ehem ako ehem~!  Bumili na ng mga sumusunod na aklat (pwedeng ipangregalo, ohohoho):

First Love (Cozy Reads Publishing) - short story antho edited by Faye Ilogon, about first love, of course.  Maganda na ang laman, maganda pa ang papel, hehe.  The book contains ten short stories by various authors (including luckychan and myself).

Very Short Stories for Harried Readers (Milflores Publishing) - flash fiction antho edited by Vince Groyon.  It contains a mix of stories from both renowned and, ehem, "youthful" writers. :)  The book contains 41 short shorts that range from 500 to 1000 words, I think.  Do buy if you're a fan of any of the following people:
 
Anna Felicia C. Sanchez, Sandra Nicole Roldan, Rodrigo V. Dela Peña Jr., Prospero E. Pulma Jr., Francezca C. Kwe, Lawrence L. Ypil, Sharmaine Galve, Raymund P. Reyes, Flori Maximo, Catherine Candano, Pam Punzalan, Ayn Frances dela Cruz, Christian Tablazon, Ana Maria S. Villanueva, Libay Linsangan Cantor, Andrea Pasion, Cecille La Verne de la Cruz, Daryll Delgado, Anne Lagamayo, Jamina Jugo, Karen Manalastas, O. Bryan Alvarez, Danton Remoto, Jhoanna Lynn B. Cruz, Bj A. Patiño, Joshua L. Lim So, John Bengan, Carljoe Javier, Jose Claudio B. Guerrero, Mark Ponce, Timothy Montes, Faye Ilogon, Apol Lejano-Massebieau, Jerome Chua, Vicente Garcia Groyon, Jean Claire A. Dy, Celeste Flores-Coscolluela, Anna Chua, Irwin Allen B. Rivera, Paul S. de Guzman, and Eliza A. Victoria.

~end shameless plug

Just yesterday, we found out that someone else was using our address when we received mail for a Mr. Mendoza. That meant either one of us was living a secret life (as a spy, a stripper, or both), or that a certain Mr. Mendoza was using our address, for reasons known only to him and to God. It turned out to be the second reason.

This left us totally perplexed. Dad, being a rather thoughtful person, went to Mr. Mendoza to deliver the misdirected piece of mail. Dad then clarified that the lot numbers for our street were assigned to have a logic to them (Odd numbers on the left, even on the right side of the road), TWENTY years ago (which was around the time we started living here). The man who received the mail, however, was convinced that they were right in using number 7, and WE were actually number 7C. Imagine, sila ay nakatira sa isang apartment building constructed fairly recently, and located further down the road (which logically means that their house number would be higher than ours), but they're insisting that WE had the wrong address. What? Pwede bang basta basta na lang humugot ka ng address just because you don't like yours? (if the system were followed, they would be on lot #13 kasi) My sister and I suspect that they're stealing our address because of superstitious reasons (the dreaded number 13). Is it right to live your life--and steal other people's addresses--based on superstition? Grabe, it would be funny if it weren't so juvenile.

* * *

Still no job. Kristina's sojourn to Australia (as migrant bear, she has moved south) has inspired people, I think, to reflect on their own futures. Mine is not exactly so peachy (refer to previous posts on the difficulty of finding employment and the nature of despair), but I see something up ahead. I think it's a thin sliver of light, but it just might be a piece of lint on the windshield.

Anyway, I'm putting most of my hopes and energies into getting into grad school, and writing a manuscript for Maam CTV. Mostly hopes. I am daunted by the sheer amount of work left to do to write something worthy of publication. I hope i am equal to the task, me with my rusty brain recently awakened from hibernation. This whole week is going to be busy, busy, busy. (incidentally, Jeric consoled me with the thought that if I HAD gotten hired, I wouldn't have enough time to finish the manuscript. Thank God for small blessings).

* * *

I recently unearthed an unfinished poem from between the pages of my copy of "The molecular biology of the cell" by Alberts. It still seems new to me.

May bagong publishing company na itinatag ang isang iniidolo kong manunulat na Pilipino. Ngayon, tumatanggap sila ng mga kwentong kumuha ng inspirasyon sa "Noli me Tangere" o "El Filibusterismo". Maaaring Inggles o Filipino ang pagkakasulat sa akda. Kung mapipili, maililimbag ang gawa mo, kasama ng iba pang kwento, sa isang anthology ng mga kwentong base sa Noli at Fili.

Mabuhay ang panitikang Pilipino!

(the same thing, in English)

A Filipino writer that I admire has put up her own publishing house. They are currently accepting stories based on, or derived from, "noli me Tangere" and/or "El filibusterismo". Submitted stories may be written in English or Filipino. If chosen, your story will be published in an anthology of works inspired by the Noli and Fili.

Long live Philippine literature!

For additional details (para sa karagdagang kaalaman):
http://www.quatre-gats.com/

***

A fragment of the story that i will be submitting for this (see above):
( Read more... )

***

Meron na ata akong astigmatism. Madali na sumakit ang ulo ko, kapag nagbababad sa harap ng computer, o nagbabasa ng libro (na parehong madalas kong gawin).

Ang (medyo) magandang balita: meron na ata akong trabaho. Pinapapunta ako ng Smart bukas sa opisina nila, para daw pag-usapan ang "terms". "Positive" naman daw ang impression sa interview ko, sabi nung tumawag na taga-Smart. Huwaw!

***

Isang pagtatambal na napaka-predictable ang resulta:

(oras na walang magawa sa mall)
+ (pagnanais igiit ang karapatang gumasta ng perang naiinip lang sa bangko)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
dalawang libro na natapos kong basahin sa loob ng dalawang araw


Ang dalawang librong ito ay ang Stainless Longganisa, na pinakabagong akda ni Bob Ong (yung nagsulat ng ABNKKBSNPLAko! at Bakit Baliktad Magbasa ng Libro ang Pilipino?), at Invisible Monsters ni Chuck Palahniuk. Ok naman sila: di masyadong nayanig ang mundo ko, walang pumutok na bulkan o sumalantang bagyo sa isipan. Pero ok naman.

Yung "Stainless Longganisa", tungkol sa pagsusulat. Adik talaga ko sa mga librong tungkol sa pagsusulat. Nakakita ako sa Powerbooks ng makapal na libro na sinulat ni Jane Smiley tungkol dito ("what to read and how to write", sabi nung subtitle), at nangati talaga ang mga kamay ko na bilhin sya (di ko binili kasi mahal. 1,300 php. wala pa kong sweldo no). May pagnanasa ko ring sinusulyapan ang librong "On Writing" ni Stephen King tuwing nagkikita kami sa bookstore.

Alam ko naman na wala rin masyadong matuturo sa kin ang mga librong ito. May paniniwala akong sa praktis lang nakukuha ang lahat. Praktis at pagbabasa ng maraming maraming libro. At siyempre, sa pagkakaroon ng maraming karanasan sa buhay.

Pero di ko mapigilan ang sarili kong kumonsulta sa mga batikan, sa mga bigatin. Ano bang sikreto nyo? Gusto kong binabasa ang mga pananaw nila tungkol sa proseso, baka sakaling may di ako napansin dati na mahalagang sangkap para sa tagumpay: mag-alay ng manok sa bisperas ng November 1; kumain ng maraming bawang; wag maligo ng isang linggo. Yung mga ganon ba. Ayos lang kung mangamoy; sabi nga ni Bob Ong, "obligasyon bilang alagad ng sining ang mangamoy"

Pero wala namang mga payo na ganon. Di rin naman kasi sya nakukuha sa mga ritwal o pamahiin; kahit akap ni Neil Gaiman, walang epekto! (pinangarap ko pa naman na sana may konting maipapahid sa aking talento si Tito Neil nung naka- free hug ako sa kanya. pero wala! wala! wala!)

***

Dear Paul oh my old friend
I always liked you but you always liked to go
I loved you from the classroom window
But you were busy making girls like me miserable
Chasing the high school girls

Dear Paul I was changed
My very first addiction was named after you
And I stared and I shed some tears
Then started writing songs to comfort me while I wait
But like some things you never came

Don't you know eleven years is a long time
To freeze a heart, eleven years is long enough
To make a girl insane

Dear Paul would you stay far
And be the bicycle that I never had
And I've tried different kinds of ice cream
And some made my throat sore
But you were only bliss
So I'll visit you in dream

Don't you know eleven years is a long time
To freeze a heart, eleven years is long enough
To make a girl insane

You make a girl insane Paul
You make a girl insane

(sa wakas, may mp3 na ko nito! nyarharhar. gusto ko talaga ang imagery sa kantang to. be the bicycle i never had.)

Kakabasa ko lang ng "Dekada '70" ni Lualhati Bautista, at taliwas sa inaasahan ko, mabilis ko syang natapos! (ako na sadyang may pagkatanga pag malalim na salita na ang ginamit). Naiyak pa nga ko sa ibang tagpo. Basta, galing. Madaling basahin, tsaka maganda ang kwento.

***

Panata ko na ngayon na magbasa ng maraming babasahing Filipino. Medyo sawa na rin akong maging makabayan kuno, pero sa "imported" na wika naman. Naaalala ko lang yung isang kwento ni Eli Ang Barroso ("Our Lady of Arts and Letters," na isinulat niya sa Inggles, take note), na sinasabing di talaga tayo maaaring maging tunay na bihasa sa Inggles. Pagkasabi nya: "E.M. Forster we are not." (At sumasang-ayon ako rito, dahil magaling talaga si E.M. Forster. Pero patay na ata sya).

Ang tanging magagawa raw natin sa wikang di atin ay "lean, unlovely prose, like Hemingway's" o puro "lush imagery" at "flowery language" na lang. Maysala ako sa parehong bintang, depende na lang sa mood ko. Sabi nga ni Rizal, di ba, na "ang di marunong gumamit ng sariling wika ay higit na mabaho sa bilasang isda"? Baka nagpaparinig rin sya sa sarili nya nung sinabi nya yun, siyang may-akda ng Noli, Fili, at Ultimo Adios, kapwa Kastila lahat ang pagkasulat. (hehe. bakit ba ko banggit nang banggit ng mga taong patay na?)

Basta, basta, basta! magiging magaling rin ako magtagalog (ewww...parang linya ng foreign-germ yun a! eww...)

***

Kailangan ko na nga palang magempake ng mga gagamitin ko sa Bohol.